(416 votes, average: 4.85 out of 5)
Loading ...Me: See Mom? (showing her my new car) This is it!
Mom: Oh, look good! No more dong cha! (Korean for busted ride)
Me: And I just got that job too! NOW are you happy?
Mom: Yes, I’m happy.
Me: NICE!
Mom: Now make me grandson and white you teeth.
{ 9 comments }
(435 votes, average: 4.77 out of 5) Loading ...I’m Taiwanese/Chinese and my wife is Caucasian. Our son David was the first grandchild on both sides of the family. Naturally my Taiwanese mother got all hepped up and bought him a million articles of clothing, including a t-shirt with a picture of a rocket and the words “Little Firecracker” on the front. The subsequent conversation went like this:
Mom: Why do they call a child who wears this shirt a firecracker?
Me: I don’t know…probably because firecrackers are small but loud and colorful, just like kids?…
Mom: Hmmm. Makes sense. (Stroking David’s hair lovingly) My little cracker…
Me: (Cracks up)
Mom: What?
Me: Uh, Mom, “cracker” is a derogatory term that non-white people call white people. Not so good, when David is half white.
Mom: Why call a white person “cracker” to insult them?
Me: I don’t know. Maybe someone thought white people are bland and boring like a saltine cracker.
Mom: But crackers are delicious!
Me: Yes, they’re good with soup, but this has nothing to do with David’s shirt.
Mom: I do not understand insulting someone by calling them a tasty food. I eat crackers all the time!
Me: Mom, this conversation has gone on, like, 5 minutes too long.
(Silence)
Mom: Well, I still like crackers.
{ 6 comments }
(122 votes, average: 3.99 out of 5) Loading ...Your sister told me you want to know what I like for Xmas ?
Here it is:
STILA ALL OVER SHIMMER LIQUID LUMINIZER
# 3 Luminous Gold
Item #873083 $22.00
At SEPHORA Store
Wrap it carefully when you send it ,Okay!
Thank you honey
HAPPY THANKSGIVING
Mom
{ 8 comments }
(177 votes, average: 4.46 out of 5) Loading ...
Mom: Why are they singing “lemonade, lemonade”?
Me: It’s “Say my name, say my name…”
{ 6 comments }
Believe it or not, My Mom is a Fob is now available in print! Not only does the book showcase your favorite entries as well as never-before-published submissions, it also features essays by the authors, Teresa and Serena Wu, and a forward by comedian Margaret Cho! Grab your copy of the book today on Amazon, Borders, or Barnes & Noble!
(5.00 out of 5) (4.87 out of 5) (4.87 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5)