Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Unsatisfied

November 26, 2008

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (416 votes, average: 4.85 out of 5)
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Me: See Mom? (showing her my new car) This is it!
Mom: Oh, look good! No more dong cha! (Korean for busted ride)
Me: And I just got that job too! NOW are you happy?
Mom: Yes, I’m happy.
Me: NICE!
Mom: Now make me grandson and white you teeth.

{ 9 comments }

Yummy little cracker

November 26, 2008

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (435 votes, average: 4.77 out of 5)
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I’m Taiwanese/Chinese and my wife is Caucasian. Our son David was the first grandchild on both sides of the family. Naturally my Taiwanese mother got all hepped up and bought him a million articles of clothing, including a t-shirt with a picture of a rocket and the words “Little Firecracker” on the front. The subsequent conversation went like this:

Mom: Why do they call a child who wears this shirt a firecracker?
Me: I don’t know…probably because firecrackers are small but loud and colorful, just like kids?…
Mom: Hmmm. Makes sense. (Stroking David’s hair lovingly) My little cracker…
Me: (Cracks up)
Mom: What?
Me: Uh, Mom, “cracker” is a derogatory term that non-white people call white people. Not so good, when David is half white.
Mom: Why call a white person “cracker” to insult them?
Me: I don’t know. Maybe someone thought white people are bland and boring like a saltine cracker.
Mom: But crackers are delicious!
Me: Yes, they’re good with soup, but this has nothing to do with David’s shirt.
Mom: I do not understand insulting someone by calling them a tasty food. I eat crackers all the time!
Me: Mom, this conversation has gone on, like, 5 minutes too long.
(Silence)
Mom: Well, I still like crackers.

{ 6 comments }

On the wishlist

November 26, 2008

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (122 votes, average: 3.99 out of 5)
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Your sister told me you want to know what I like for Xmas ?
Here it is:

STILA ALL OVER SHIMMER LIQUID LUMINIZER
# 3 Luminous Gold
Item #873083 $22.00
At SEPHORA Store

Wrap it carefully when you send it ,Okay!
Thank you honey

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Mom

{ 8 comments }

Destiny’s Child gets thirsty

November 26, 2008

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (177 votes, average: 4.46 out of 5)
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Mom:
Why are they singing “lemonade, lemonade”?
Me:
It’s “Say my name, say my name…”

{ 6 comments }