Please use your hand

August 24, 2009

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Dear Mihir Beta,

How are you doing? I am missing you. Keep healthy. Sleep well and eat well. Please call and talk for few minutes. You keep saying, “I got to go”. That is hurting. I would like to know what you are doing or how studying is going on. Do your best. Donot do too many things. This is the age to work hard and make your life. You have to make some sacrifices on some pleasures.

Donot get entangled with any girl. I know you want to have physical relationship with a girl. Please use your hand. It is safest way. For your stars only girl can give you problem now. I know all your friends have girl friend and you feel bad. Remember you will have a great life ahead of you. Donot accept any girl even if she comes to you. Just wait. Character is the most important thing in life.

Happy Diwali!!!!! for Friday. Pray to Divine Cosmic Energy to give you strength of mind, body and spirit.

My Blessings and Love to You,
Mom

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Tagged as: advice, diwali, girlfriends, girls, prayers, relationships, sex

  • yasuro

    Did she actually mean “to masturbate” when she said “use your hand'?

  • Sabina

    Aww, it's a Desi (subcontinent/South Asian) mommy! How cute.

    Yeah I was wondering the same thing about using hand– but I didn't think a desi mom would say anything like that, so I thought maybe she meant “hold hands” with a girl? Otherwise, the mom is quite blatant.

  • http://twistedsusan.blogspot.com/ Susan

    I wish my mom was a FOB.

  • Jesica

    LOL do you really? :)

  • Mememe

    I didn't even think of masturbating when I read that, I thought it meant fingering…? Lol

  • Joe

    Omg. The fingering was what I thought.

  • http://caligulasanchez.blogspot.com/ Caligula

    My Desi mom has advised me to stay chaste and masturbate on more than one occasion

  • J

    Omg, this is the Indian version of my mother.

  • amanda

    i was thinking maybe she meant “use your head”…?

  • adsf1343

    how…embarassing….XD

  • Rocknrope

    You figure that out all by yourself?

  • Rocknrope

    I see two potential replacements for the “Is funk means sexy” tagline:

    “”I got to go”. That is hurting.” or

    “Please use your hand. It is safest way.”

  • Tiff

    This has got to be fake.

  • Desigirl

    The “make your life” sounds really desi
    but when it said “use your hand” i KNEW it was fake!

  • http://www.twitter.com/resawu Teresa Wu

    who doesn't? :)

  • Katrina

    jeez, no wonder he doesn't stay on the phone very long…

  • mbastinks

    haha…thats so fake!

  • Savannah

    omg.

  • anon

    lol aside from the “please use your hand”, my parents and I have had this exact conversation several times.

  • rja

    this is so not fake. this is total indian mom! i'm quite she did mean masturbation. “that is hurting” is also classic indian fobby. and the whole character/strength of body/mind/spirit thing. heh.

  • msy

    not fake at all. my chinese mother says exactly the same to me, just with worse grammar and spelling. and much more unnecessary punctuation

  • Whee?

    Oh dearies! I know a Mihir and I definitely know one who has gone abraod to study AND is sad that he doesn't have a girlfriend. LOL and this is not fake.. and by using hands, she meant masturbation =)) its considered healthy.. you know. Masturbating is supposed to be way better than losing your virginity =))

    SO typical!! My mum's the same. Except that she sends all these weird forwards on divine cosmic energy.

  • http://nightlithium.fateback.com/ Nightlithium

    She's right, that's like, the ultimate in safe sex.

  • http://nightlithium.fateback.com/ nightlithium

    lyk omg. XD

    Yeh me 2 tho, after a second.

  • http://nightlithium.fateback.com/ Nightlithium

    She's right, that's like, the ultimate in safe sex.

  • http://nightlithium.fateback.com/ nightlithium

    lyk omg. XD

    Yeh me 2 tho, after a second.

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