(415 votes, average: 4.72 out of 5)
Loading ...For my first trip to Korea, my family’s homeland, my mother very neatly sowed a ziplock bag filled with three hundred dollars to the crotch of my favorite pair of underwear. When I protested, she said to me, “li-bah-kah! Never trust Korean people!” Then she showed me how to hand wash them every night with ivory soap so that the money wouldn’t get wet.
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(356 votes, average: 4.63 out of 5) Loading ...When I was in sixth grade, I walked into the living room while my mother was watching a movie. She looks at me horrified and says, “What kind of movie is this?” I picked up the box. It’s Godfather – mom, this movie is really violent. It’s about gangsters. “It’s not about God?” No mom, that’s God THE Father, this is THE Godfather.
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(1,055 votes, average: 4.84 out of 5) Loading ...“My parents’ intent was to name me Stephanie.”
-Staphanie Tung
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(511 votes, average: 4.77 out of 5) Loading ...My adorable grandma needed to make dinner for some very important people from the American Embassy and she couldn’t understand the English grocery labels, so she bought some canned meat, served it, and it was a hit.
Later that night, my grandpa looked in the trash and lo and behold…
…the guests had a Purina meal fit for a pup!
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(298 votes, average: 3.60 out of 5) Loading ...So last night I went downstairs to get my nightly cup of water and saw my mommy making my lunch. I started laughing because she was taking out a slice of bread from the bag, placing it on the clear wrap, then grabbing some ham to put on the bread—all with chopsticks. I chuckled and asked, “LOL Mommy.. why are you making my sandwich with chopsticks??!?”
She stared at me for a while and finally responded, “I don’t want to get my hands dirty…”
…and continued to make the sandwich.
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(350 votes, average: 4.71 out of 5) Loading ...My girlfriend (who submitted the Prostate Eyebars one) forgot to submit one of my favorite fob moments from her mom.
A while ago, she was telling me for the hundredth time about about a great food her mom sometimes serves, called Binker. Something finally clicked in my head, and I asked her if she had ever seen the name of this food written out. She said no, so I told her to call her mom and ask her how to spell it.
“B… E… A… N… C… U… R… D.”
She had been going around saying this inherited non-word for 21 years.
Oh, also, until she was probably 10, she thought that after bathing, one dried off with towers.
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Believe it or not, My Mom is a Fob is now available in print! Not only does the book showcase your favorite entries as well as never-before-published submissions, it also features essays by the authors, Teresa and Serena Wu, and a forward by comedian Margaret Cho! Grab your copy of the book today on Amazon, Borders, or Barnes & Noble!
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