One Cock, Please
Posted on January 15, 2010 at 03:54pm
My mom and I were eating at a Denny’s a while back, and the following conversation ensued.
Mom: I’d like a cock.
Waitress: Um … a Coke?
Me: Yes, she would like a Coke.
Mom: Yes. A cock.
(183 votes, average: 4.86 out of 5)
Loading ...Mom Learns E-mail
Posted on January 13, 2010 at 12:46pm
Just taught my mom how to use e-mail yesterday. Here’s her first valiant attempt:
Budgeting for the Ice Age
Posted on January 11, 2010 at 12:38pm
My mom is telling me how we should be saving money. This is what her email said:
Yes, we are.
Keep going for 2010 so that we can save more for your and JK’s future.
Be a good squirrel ready for ice age.
What’s Your Fright Number?
Posted on January 11, 2010 at 12:36pm
My dear daughter,
Da Ju Ju will pick you up at airport. either drive you to Hotel in Taipei or take high speed train. We need to know your fright number as soon as possible.
Mom
(118 votes, average: 3.66 out of 5)Preventing 7-11
Posted on January 7, 2010 at 12:02pm
Last week, my mom was watching the news that a terrorist was stopped by passengers on a plane during Christmas.
Mom: “We almost had another 7-11 this Christmas, thank god the terrorist was stopped!”
Away Message Speak
Posted on January 5, 2010 at 08:15am
My mom always asks me to help her with her English, especially when it comes to her grammar and vocabulary. One evening while I am still at work, I see my mom on Yahoo chat and decided to say hi. With no immediate reply, I left my desk to attend to something else. This is what I see when I return 15 minutes later:
me: hi mom
me: are you there?
mom: mei
*** Auto-response sent to mom: I am currently idle.
mom: you
mom: you just testing my english, when i look the word “idel” i don’t understand what that mean. i have to check dictionary right away, now i know waht meaning
mom: that mean “nothing to do?” you have time?
mom: no answer?! okay byebye!
*** “mom” signed off at Mon Dec 21 16:56:01 2009.
Mom Likes a Man in Uniform
Posted on January 2, 2010 at 10:32am
A couple of years ago my family went to a plane show where there were people in the army next to jets and fun stuff like that. It was a particularly hot day and these army men were wearing their full suits. We were already looking at one of the jets when this exchange happened:
Mom: I feel so hot for you! It is very hot weather today!
Soldier: Uh, thanks…
What she really meant was “You must be hot in your uniform.” And the soldier was pretty creeped out.
Ride the Girls
Posted on December 31, 2009 at 11:24am
I was hanging out w/ two female friends in my living room, and my mom sent me a text message right before going to bed:
“Do you also have to ride the girls back? you need to drive extra carefully. I need to sleep now.”
Internet Proficiency
Posted on December 28, 2009 at 07:49pm
Me: What browser are you using?
Mom: Google.
Me: Google is not a browser. Are you using Internet Explorer?
Mom: Yes, I’m using the internet.
Me: *sigh*
