Posted on May 12, 2010 at 06:36pm
My mom was trying to book a plane ticket to go visit her sister in San Francisco:
Mom: Aunt Esther get free plane ticket because she is freaky flyer
Me: Freaky flyer?!
Mom: She fly all the time!
Me: Oh! FREQUENT flyer!
Posted on May 10, 2010 at 02:08pm
Daughter,
We attended June’s wedding last Saturday. it’s very nice. food is good too. small size just like yours.
she looks very beautiful the groom is very handsome, just a little bit too short. very good young man with great furniture.
Love you,
Mommy
Posted on May 4, 2010 at 02:26pm
I left my dog, Grizzly, at home with my mom for a week while I went on Spring Break. During that time, I received a very concerned email from her:
Sometimes he made love with pillow, lick his g-g*. 20 min. ago, his g-g was very long. The length is about my middle finger. Don’t know if you know about these thing. He is only under 3 yrs old. Last year when I was in Taiwan taking care of Ruby, there was a female dog in “?” period (don’t know the english). The smell from her last one week. Thus some male dogs always follow her. Grizzly’s case, I don’t know why he showed this kind of reaction.
*It sounds like penis in Chinese.
Posted on May 1, 2010 at 08:09am
Mike,
I heard you will go to Las Vegas for a Bachelor party. I concern of the event.
One should consider himself with Dignity in Respectful manner. Reckless people might want to put you in Test. Specially while you’re in toxic(alcohol), suggesting you to do some activities that you shouldn’t ever do, like sleeping with a dangerous girl.
When I mentioned my concerns to Simmons, he told me about [Hang over] movie. I’m not sure what is about that movie, but keep in mind that Marriage is one step of Maturity process to become responsible in order to make a Family unit, which include a child. So don’t get tricked by less sincere people’s attempt to ruin your life.
Enjoy your life as mush, but always remind yourself that you have a wide awakened conscious is observing you to guide you in Light to make you eventually an Enlighten one.
I trust you always, but because of my caution I had to mention this.
with great love,
Mom
Posted on April 29, 2010 at 12:31am
My mom politely sent me a “thank you” email for helping her edit a letter she wrote.
Subject: halp me to take look the grammartic errors
Body:
Hello kid,
Thanks! for editing for me.
Mom
Posted on April 21, 2010 at 12:09pm
After a recent screening colonoscopy, I asked my mom if she was got to see her intestines on the TV screen during the procedure.
Posted on April 19, 2010 at 10:57am
Me: Hey mom, do you want to go see How to Train a Dragon?
Mom: Why? I don’t have dragon!?
Me: Mom, it’s a movie…
Mom: So? I still don’t have dragon!
Posted on April 15, 2010 at 05:52pm
Hi tawn,
I am trying to practice send E mail. and Daddy think I am very bad.
need to do it more often. But I don’t have too many people to send it too.
Soo… here you are like or not.
Love mom
Posted on April 15, 2010 at 05:49pm
I was on my way to my internship via subway in Korea one summer and this 60-year old man decided he wanted to hit on me. He came over and told me he would give me his name card and after I rejected him I texted my mom to tell her what happened. Her reply: “psycho like that need to get their penis thin sliced. mommy good at cooking and chopping, i do it for you. take his name card.”
Posted on April 7, 2010 at 05:12pm
patti. when you upload the pictures to the facebook, you need to screen before you do it. choose and upload only the pictures of good ones. i think you upload all the pictures or all the good picture of you. you need to screen of bad pictures of me and jess, daddy and danny. definetely you should delete the picture of you and danny with red cap in the boat. delete all the picture of me looking fat.
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