(26 votes, average: 3.00 out of 5)
Loading ...Mom: and today tony had a surgery ,cut some things from nect [tony is my dad, and she meant neck]
Me: what? what things?
Mom: meat
Me: why?
Mom: meat ball
Me: hahahahaha so nothing bad?
Mom: he eat too much meat so it grow in the neck
{ 3 comments }
(103 votes, average: 4.83 out of 5) Loading ...My mom got me a cake to celebrate my law school graduation:
{ 14 comments }
(120 votes, average: 4.83 out of 5) Loading ...
My mom recently came back from Taiwan and sent me a care package filled with Taiwanese goodies. I open the package and peanuts come spilling out everywhere. Apparently, these “Authentic Taiwanese” peanuts were originally in a bag, which wouldn’t fit in the USPS “Flat Rate” box. So to make the most out of her money, she poured the peanuts out of the bag, into the box and let them fill every nook and crevice of the box!
(It literally brings a new meaning to “packing peanuts!”)
Editor’s Note: OMG, pineapple cakes — your mom spoils you!
{ 14 comments }
(117 votes, average: 4.67 out of 5) Loading ...By text:
Mom: The fresh flat noodle in the store that sale fresh tofu n bean sprout ask the people around there. the food call kon xao ngau ho. it has garlic, beef, green union, bean sprout, oyster sauce or soy sauce. enjoy love u. say hello to ashley
Mom: Did you receive my recpc?
Me: What is recpc?
She called me 5 minutes after I sent that text.
Mom: Phyllis! I don’t know how to spell recipe!
Me: Ohhh haha, yeah, I got the recipe mom.
Mom: Okay I love you, bye.
Me: I love you too.
Text after the call:
Mom: How do u spell it ?re s pc?
Me: Recipe.
Mom: Miss u……….
{ 10 comments }
(210 votes, average: 4.71 out of 5) Loading ...With iPhone in hand my mother she provides joy with her texting skills. It’s actually kind of cute but extremely frustrating when you are pressed for time.
Me: Coming to ur house now. Do you want McDonald’s?
Mom: Dad ya.
Me: What does he get?
Me: i’m in the drive in…i can’t remember…hurry
Mom: Merphin w Dosage*
Me: What?
Merphin w Dosage = Muffin w Sausage
{ 9 comments }
(151 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5) Loading ...My mom was on the phone with me, and I told her that I was at a pretty well known Italian chain restaurant in our area, Buca Di Beppo’s. When I went home, my sister said my mom told her:
“Your sister went to Peptodibismo!”
{ 9 comments }
(211 votes, average: 4.74 out of 5) Loading ...I noticed my mom was loosing weight and asked if she was doing anything in particular.
She responds, “I am on a low crap diet.”
{ 8 comments }
(227 votes, average: 4.72 out of 5) Loading ...
I look into the refrigerator and see a big brown paper bag and ask my mom what’s in it.
Me: What’s in the bag?
Mom: Oranges for Chinese New Year. Did I spell ‘touch’ right? T-O-U-C-H right?
Me: Yeah you spelled ‘touch’ right but you spelled oranges wrong…
Mom: (pronouncing oranges with a chinese accent) Or-an-gee. What’s the right spelling then?
Me: You spelled Oregon. That’s a place!
Mom: OH, HAHAHA. Fix it before your siblings eat all the oranges!!
{ 12 comments }
(173 votes, average: 3.78 out of 5) Loading ...Hi Elizabeth,
How are you doing? How is your paper coming along? I miss you~~~~. How are you surviving the below freezing weather in Boston? It’s so cold here, too, with the temperature hovering around 38 F~. I am very sleepy at work, staring at & trying to read these boring scientific progress reports—. Only thing I can do is eat MORE chocolates. I have Christmas colored peanut M&Ms, mini 3 Musketeers mint dark chocolate, mini Twix bars & Dove mint silky milk chocolate squares~~~. I also had those mint M&M, but I ate them all-gobbled them down-chomp, chomp!.
I hope you are not following my example and be good, eating healthy snacks. 
;)
Love you & miss you.
Love,
Mom
{ 10 comments }
Believe it or not, My Mom is a Fob is now available in print! Not only does the book showcase your favorite entries as well as never-before-published submissions, it also features essays by the authors, Teresa and Serena Wu, and a forward by comedian Margaret Cho! Grab your copy of the book today on Amazon, Borders, or Barnes & Noble!
(5.00 out of 5) (5.00 out of 5) (4.87 out of 5) (4.87 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5) (4.85 out of 5)