Loading ...
So I went with my family to a buffet where I had a dodgy oyster and ended up hurling in the bathroom. The restaurant’s manager came out to talk to apologize to my parents while I had gone to the bathroom and when I came out, the most epic conversation with my mom ensued:
Mom: Ohh the manager came to talk to us. He said he was lesbian.
Me: Huh? You mean gay, right? He’s male…
Mom: No no, lesbian. He said he was from the Middle East.
Me: OHHHH!! You mean hes LEBANESE.
Mom: Yeah! Lesbian!
Loading ...
dearest bao,
i made eggplant parmesan today with 3 different kinds of cheese. it was really good. didi said that it tasted like lasagna! i don’t know why i like to copy down those Italian recipes so much. maybe because i like cheese a lot. anyway, this is a really easy dish to make too so i will teach you.
when i went to the middle-eastern store to buy eggplants, i noticed something really funny. there are different kinds of eggplant: chinese, japanese, italian, indian, and american. and the american eggplants are the biggest and fattest among all the eggplants! HAHAHAHAAHA. just like their people!
have a good night bao and a good day tomorrow!
mama
Loading ...
Mom: Hey, why you have all the black guy on your wall? Your wall all cover in the black guy.
Me: They’re different musicians I like.
Mom. No. You look like the gay. You invite girls here, they going to think you the gay. You so skinny already, OK, don’t go look like the gay guy.
Loading ...
Me: So Nini has a new boyfriend.
Mom: Oooooh? What is he?
Me: Um, Vietnamese…
Mom: OH! That good, very good.
Me: And Mexican.
Mom: …So he a tamale eggroll.
Loading ...
Me: Yea, he’s been having a lot of issues, so this is probably good for him.
Mom: Is he white or…?
Me: Yes.
Mom: What’s that word? Cocaine?
Me: …Caucasian?
Mom: You can put this on momfob.com!
(183 votes, average: 4.74 out of 5)